Back Online and Ready to Write!

I just noticed that on my first writing that more then half of it is highlighted. I didn't do that! None of it should be highlighted and I can't figure out how to get it off of there. I'm having alittle bit of a problem trying to get started on this again. Of Course, it might help tremendously if I go back and read where I dropped off.


Well, I just looked at it and I just realized how long it's been since I wrote! It's been about 6 months, oh where does the time go?


I had too change my email on this thing so if I had any followers, I hope it didn't mess them up! I'm still not really sure how to use this blog site. To me and hopefully to alot of others, it is very confusing.


I do know that the auto save really messes me up. All I have to do is stop typing for 2 seconds to collect my thoughts and ZAP! auto save. Why does it do that so fast? Some people just can't type or think that fast!


Ok, now I can't remember what my last post said so I'll have to go back and read it again. Geez, getting old really sucks! Everything goes! Memory, sight, hearing, moving around, etc.... it's nothing to look forward to believe me.



I guess I had decided to stop my blog writings until I got a chance to look through my trunk of pictures so I'm kind of on the right schedule except for the fact that my internet had gotten shut off and screwed me all up. That's the biggest reason I stopped writing for so long. Now it seems I'm not in the same mode I was in before. You know, trying to write of my growing up years so I'll just write whatever comes to mind and hope that you all don't mind.



I've been sick since yesterday and I don't know how to act when I'm sick. I'm hardly ever sick or when I am, I don't slow down. I automatically keep doing what a woman or mother has to do. Really, to be honest (and I'm sure you woman out there can relate) it doesn't pay for us to get sick and slow down. We usually get no sympathy, no help with anything. I do have to say that finally after all these years, my husband has changed. He does step up and try to help me out when I'm sick or at least doesn't make the normal demands a husband makes everyday. I have to say that, THAT alone makes me feel more loved by him. You all know what I mean, right? I do understand that he didn't have very good examples growing up and how a man is supposed to treat a woman but he has really broke that bad mold and has done really well. I am not just saying that because I know he'll be reading this blog, it's true.



I am having a hard time even thinking about my growing up years right now. I don't know why but I guess I just don't want to think about it right now. Maybe I'll get back into it soon cause I'm sure you're interested. So...... let's just stay in the present for right now.


I've been sick since yesterday and I don't know how to act when I'm sick. I'm hardly ever sick or when I am, I don't slow down. I automatically keep doing what a woman or mother has to do. Really, to be honest (and I'm sure you woman out there can relate) it doesn't pay for us to get sick and slow down. We usually get no sympathy, no help with anything. I do have to say that finally after all these years, my husband has changed. He does step up and try to help me out when I'm sick or at least doesn't make the normal demands a husband makes everyday. I have to say that, THAT alone makes me feel more loved by him. You all know what I mean, right? I do understand that he didn't have very good examples growing up and how a man is supposed to treat a woman but he has really broke that bad mold and has done really well. I am not just saying that because I know he'll be reading this blog, it's true.I am having a hard time even thinking about my growing up years right now. I don't know why but I guess I just don't want to think about it right now. Maybe I'll get back into it soon cause I'm sure you're interested. So...... let's just stay in the present for right now.This morning, just like most mornings lately, I have an altercation with my mother in law over her medications. Every morning I check her little "daily med box" to double check to make sure they are all there and every morning she comes out of her room and tells me I forgot to put in a xanax and something else. I tell her that I checked and they where ALL there but she demands I give her the missing ones. Then when they run out early she doesn't know why and pretty much accuses me or her son of taking them.Now yesterday is a good example of how she is. I'd sure love to secretly video tape her some time. She acts completely different when her son is around. He no longer walks out the door when her true colors (or feelings) about me come out. Oh I tell him but he doesn't believe me of course. She gets this evil look on her face and verbally attacks me in one way or another. In front of people, she says oh I love Beth she's like a daughter to me but when nobody's around it all changes. She doesn't like me, she never has since the first time she met me. The first real out in the open thing she did was on our wedding day. I had everything planned out just the way I wanted or as much as I could have. I did have the color scheme I'd always dreamed of having. Blue, cream and silver. I mean what's more simple? You know what she did? She brought her daughter (my bridesmaid) in YELLOW! We all went out to the store and I picked out a dress on the clerance rack that was 10.00. Not the one I really wanted but I knew they couldn't spend 30.00 for the actual one. I had to leave the store before she went through the check out line because of a prior appt concerning my wedding dress. Well after I left she put it back on the rack and didn't buy it!At the dressing room while getting ready for my "Big Day" she pulled out the yellow dress. I asked what happened to the one we picked out and you know what she said? She said she didn't like it so she was just gonna let "Delana" wear her prom dress for the wedding! Now that's just down right hateful!Needless to say, she was like that then and she's like that to this day towards me (when Michael's not around) She has opened up a few time's infront of my daughter in law Jessie. So at least I do have one person that has seen it. I'd still like to catch her on video though.Oh there is so many different things that she's done but I'll save them for another day. I have things to do today but maybe I will be able to write more after I'm done.
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